happily-ever-afterI really don't know who create this sentense...

they lived happily ever after. 

It seems to appear in every fairy tale book I have ever read to my kids. 

It come to this moment that I am almost afraid to read fairy tale stories to my kids any more. 

Is it because of this, so many of us believe that we do not need to work ANY MORE as soon as we find the Mr./Ms. Right.

Is it because of this, so we believe that once we are married, nothing shall go wrong?

Once we are married, it will be IT? ( Happy ever after?)

I'm just not quite sure why people believe they don't need to work it once they are married?

If people do live happy ever after, then shall we just forget about all other emotion that come with us in one package?  

If we do not know how to cry and how to be sad, then how do we learn to be happy? Will Happiness mean anything once Sadness has been forgotten?

Whenever I read the story, and "They live happily ever after" come to the end of the story. I usually paused and do not know how to continue it.  My daughter often finish the sentense for me and said: ...and they lived happily ever after. 

Then I will look at them and said: Well...you see... people don't just live happy ever after once they are married.  They will have to work their marriage in order to learned their happiness...

Then my son will interrupt: But that's how the story always end...

I: I know. but that's not really it.  The author just being lazy to write about how to work it in order to be happy ever after. (Well, most of them may not know how.  and that will include me.) So instead, they used this sentense to end the book.  Otherwise, how to live happily ever after may be another several books to write. 

So My 7 years old looks confused enough: You meants, they don't live happily ever after when they get married?

I: Well, No.  They will live happily together if they work it together.  But that doesn't garantee they will be happy all the time.  They may fight, or they may disagree...but if they are both willing to work it out, they usually will come to a happy solution to it. Just like you and your brother. 

My kids: so how do you work it?

I: That...I cannot answer you.  But I guess that's why we were born to find out.

But it just get me wonder: Do we all stop working our marriage because we are all deepl y brain washed by those fairy tale while we were kids?   Is that why most of us expecting everything should be "RIGHT" once we find the Mr./Ms. Right?  

Maybe, it's time for us to start telling a more realistic story to our kids. Slowly blend the knowledge they need to know into their common sense.  

So, when they become grown-up just like us one day, they will actually expecting to work their marriage in order to earn happiness instead of expecting happiness should come once they are married...
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Ruowen Huang

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