Ruowen Huang

I don't like to tell my kids what is 'good' for them, because I know the word 'good' would only make them want to do something bad.  I don't like to label 'good' for them, since I believe that's something they will have to figure out for themselve.  So instead of saying this is good for you, I often told them what it is in my point of views and they can make a choice for themselves. 

You see, Taoism (Lao Tzu) believes all human were born evil, verse Buddism (Chuan Tzu) believes all human were born good hearted.  As for me, I believe they both had their reason for their theory, but from what I observe was; all human were born good hearted when it comes others, but they will continuously challenge what's good for them and seek every possible way to prove that 'good' is not the only way of living. 

Other than million examples I could give to you, I will use food as example.  We all know how much we hated the food that was good for us when we were young, we were continously seeking for bad food and eventually develope a bad habbit of snacking all those bad food.  It was not until older when we decided to consume some "healthy food' due to our concern of our weight or any other execuse.  But we spent so much time seeking for food that was not good when we were young, those 'bad food' eventually became 'comfort food'.   So when we do not feel like being good, we then consume bad food to comfort our mind.  As for me, it is such a sad concept that people cannot even listen to their body and consume whatever their body told them, but rather attached to the meaning they put behind the food and be addicted to a habbit they cannot quit.  

So I start avoiding say which food is good for my kids.  I will explain what kind of influence will different kind of food do to their body, and it's for them to decide how they would like to treat their body.  After all, it's their body.  I believe their body know what's the best for them.  At the meanwhile, I will try to identify what their body wants is different from what their mind crave.  For example, I had been telling them that meat will provide protein which create muscle, Vegetable will provide fiber which make them grow, Carb creates energy, but too much enery will make them tired. and milk will give them calcium to build their bone if they wants to grow as tall as their father. 

My kids doesn't like vegetable, so they do not eat too much vegetable on the dining table.  Which was fine by me, because I didn't like to eat vegetable when I was young either.  So whenever they gave me that yucky look when they tasted vegetable, i would say "that's fine.  Put it aside then.  It only taste yucky because your tonque is not fully develope yet.  Maybe try it again when you are little bit order and see if your tonque is develope yet."  

I don't know about you all, but I do know that I always want to be a grown-up when I was kid.   Knowing my kids always wanted to demonstrated how much they grew, I did find them trying vegetable quietly here and there to check whether they are develop or not.  As for now, they went from completely no vegetable at all to occasionaly salad with Ranch dressing. (their new discovered flavour)  They do not need me to tell them what's good for them, because I believe they all know that anyway.  But at least, they have a choice - choice of whether they want muscle, energy, fiber or calcium that day.  Choice always make people believe they are more a grown up, don't you think?

And in the other day, I made Cheese Marcanoni with tomato.  As usual, my kids always picked tomato up and gave me that yucky face.  So I said "Science said that eating tomato will keep you away from Cancer, so it's up to you whether you would like to keep cancer away or not." I mumbled while eating my food.  But in the next second, I realized all the tomato was gone on my son's bowl.  I was surprised, so I asked "Where did all the tomato go?"

He then proudly opened his mouth and showed me "I ate it all."  So I laughed "I guess you don't like cancer."  and then saw he shook his head and said "no one like cancer."

Just then, my daughter continued "Maybe I can eat Ketchup instead.  Because it's made of Tomato."

and I kept laughing "Well, sugar will dilute the nutrition.  But I guess it's better than nothing."

"But I don't like the tomato, it's too sour for me." She said.

"So I guess your tonque is not fully develop yet.  Maybe when you are older, you will like it one day." 

"Maybe," She said, quietly scoop a tomato to test whether she liked it or not.  It was when my son laughed at her and said "I guess my body is developing faster than you."

See, don't we all want to be a grown up when we were kid?  We don't care for something good, we only want to know whether we have choice in life.  So if you have difficulty feeding your kids 'healthy food', maybe this is an option for you to try.   Whether they eat what you want them to eat or not, believe they are simply developing.  Maybe their tast bud will be fully develop one day.