this is the most weird question that I often heard from people that how come I only update my status in Chinese or how come I don't update my English blog often?
Gee! isn't it obvious? Because, I am CHINESE! of course I will update Chinese way more often than English!
It doesn't matter how long I have been living in Vancouver, Chinese is still my native language. I was born and raised there before I moved to Vancouver. I was formed and shaped by Chinese background before English became part of my life. So I felt comfortable expressed myself with in or even yelling at my kids with it. When it comes to express what I was thinking, of course I will use Chinese most of time. Because it is part of me that I cannot erase and definitely don't want to erase. In the matter of fact, I am actually quite proud of it.
But I do think English sometimes. Sometimes, and with quite a broken English, too. No matter how fluent I am in conversation, I can never be a Native English Speaker. Because we think differently, talk different, and grew up with very different background, too. So I will write English if any thought happened to be in my mind, but you all shall know that all gramatical errors should be expected since I've never educated properly in English. I also gave up trying to translate my own post into English one, because it's simply impossible for me to do and also wasted too much of my time. I often ended up being procrocinated, rather than having anything productive done.
But the most important thing of all, is that I finally had a desire to record everything down. So one day, my children will be able to know what kind of mother they have, what I know and what was in my mind while I was raising them.
One by one, little by little. I am not sure how long I can keep doing this. but I know it will be better than nothing. Of course, if their Chinese somehow become wonderful by miracle, they would be able to found out way more about me through my Chinese blog. Otherwise, this place would be a good start. And for you all if you were ever curious about me. Here would be a beginning. And I will see how long can I go along with it.